This is not how I wanted my life to be. Why shouldn’t I be disappointed with God?
You have played football all through high school and college. You’re good enough to go pro, and a scout for a major league teams pays you a visit. After some interviews and tests, he hires you. Your lifelong dream is set. Then the doctors find a defect in your heart, and to continue playing would mean certain death. Your whole life was all planned out, now everything crashes.
You’re 45 years old and single. You always wanted to get married and have a family. You see people your age with kids in elementary and junior high. You see those parents enjoying soccer games and dance classes. Why didn’t God send someone to you so you could enjoy a family? You prayed and pleaded with God, but you are 45 years old, will it ever happen?
Job experienced situations in his life that crashed his dreams. In 1 day all of his children died and his wealth was gone. Then a short time later he was covered head to toe with painful sores. Job did not know why these things were happening but he never sinned by charging God with wrongdoing. He was grieving over his kids’ death. He did not know if he would ever recover from financial ruin. Would he be healed of his sores? What would the future bring? Listen to what Job says.
My spirit is broken, my days are cut short, the grave awaits me. My eyes have grown dim with grief; my whole frame is but a shadow. My days have passed, my plans are shattered and so are the desires of my heart. Where then is my hope? Who can see any hope for me?
Job 17:1,7,11,15
Do you hear his despair? Does your heart go out to him? Do you feel the hopelessness? Finally Job in all his frustration pleads to God for answers, why is this happening? Hear what God’s response is.
Then the Lord answered Job out of the storm. He said; “Who is this that darkens my counsel with words without knowledge? Brace yourself like a man; I will question you, and you shall answer me. Where were you when I laid the earth’s foundation? Tell me if you understand. Who marked off its dimensions? Surely you know! Who stretched a measuring line across it? On what were its footings set, or who laid its cornerstone?
Job 38:1-6
God is not being heartless in His response, only to the point. God is saying that He is God and Job is not. God never explains why Job is going through such hard times. He does not have to because God is God.
Back to your question: why shouldn’t I be disappointed with God? The answer is that God is bigger than your situation. Let God be God and you be His creation to glorify a big God. Get into the Bible and study the passages that tell of a God that is a great God. Praise Him for being God and that you could be His child. Then trust Him for your future and serve Him in it. Do not dwell in what you don’t have, look for opportunities to serve God in some way. Look for someone to love and help; serve in your church, make a difference in someone’s life.